[ Mental Health ] Open Question : Why can't I just be responsible?

I know I'm going to get a ton of hate for asking this question, but I can't afford a therapist, and in just looking for advice. Let me just start off by saying I'm 20, I work a full time job and I go to school...but I'm irresponsible when it comes to other things. My check engine light comes on? I ignore it. Bills pileup? I ignore them. I have a problem that doesn't relate to school or work? I ignore it. I have a health problem? I ignore it. it almost like I'm running away from my problems. I think I have an answer but I'm not sure...So I grew up the oldest of 10 kids. I had a huge amount of responsibility at SUCH a young age. I think I just got burned out way too quickly. and now I'm 20, and I hate responsibility. I want to change. I want to get a hold of reality... I just can't for some reason. I don't even know where to start. Any advice? Point me into the right direction...

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