[ Family ] Open Question : How to deal with my emotional abusive mom?

I've always felt intimidated by my mom. Making mistakes like overthinking & misunderstanding something causes her to berate me. These berates has an impact on my social insecurities: I feel there's something to keep up around ppl., just to avoid intimidation/silent judging. I feel the need to have justifications for mistakes. My mom compares me to others & ask "why can't I be like them?" I'm very sensitive. If my mom responds w/an attitude in her voice/action, I feel the blame. One night, money was tight & we went to Target to buy pizza for dinner. She was mad I was looking at the pizzas w/higher prices. I felt the blame for her anger & blew my breath for my frustration, which she negatively responded. Throughout the store, my mom whispered: 'How sensitive i am. She hated me. She wanted to strangle me, give me up to my deadbeat dad.' I wanted to freak out, but couldn't. She constantly slapped/punched me while driving recklessly & screaming. It was the 4th time she's done this. She apologized w/1 sorry & blamed me for her saying those things & driving like that, like she didn't have the self control. I know my mom has a lot to handle, being a single mother raising a son, along w/ having no friends/support from our broken family. I'd never purposely act up to make her mad. I'm a high school senior & my fear of making mistakes is already present. I have no family members, close teachers/friends to talk to. How do I deal w/this?

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